Do you know why they call it ‘heartbreak?’
Let me tell you why.
Because the moment love flees, your heart would harden. Your chest tightens, until it is difficult to breathe. Your lungs would then frantically grasp for air, your veins would start to clench, and for a moment it would feel as if you’ve lost your senses.
A few seconds of numbness.
Then if you listen closely, you would hear that first snap. And feel something close to a kick in the gut. Pain flows through your blood, its heat rises to the surface, singeing your skin, making you cringe. Already bruised and battered, the heart knows it doesn’t stand a chance. The strain has finally exceeded its strength. With a roar only you could hear, your heart starts to break, piece by piece, into fragments of unrecognizable shards.
Just when you think it’s over, another fissure splits open. As it burst into splinters, the pain is fresh each time. Waves of nausea would assault your insides, your mouth would taste the bitter taste of bile, and tears would pour out from your eyes.
Just as quickly as it hits you, those feelings would disappear. Their presence is replaced by quiet emptiness that is deceitful in its stillness. Because as soon as the pain subsides, another piece of your heart would break, and then the whole cycle would begin again.
Until there is nothing left but broken-off scraps... that one day would be all blown away by time.
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But as time passes it slowly begins to heal until it is completely renewed and capable of loving again and then that familiar feeling comes along and you feel warmth surrounding your slightly beating heart and you feel it flutter...it tingled and then you allow the feeling to enter and overtake you till you feel it in your stomach the fluttering butterflies....the sensation in your woman area and you embrace it. You succumb to it. You let the love grow till it engulfs your heart whole and it is once again the bright, beating loving heart you once knew....
ReplyDeleteMy sweet friend, if you weren't living thhis horrible nightmare, I would tell you that this writing was so beautiful and vivid, that your writing captured every single moment of losing someone you loved and who thought loved you. But this is how your heart feels right now and so I cannot praise the writing, because my insides are aching with the pain you are feeling.
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing I can say to make this better...but if it helps to know that I am here, thinking of you, loving you from here....then please know I am.
Sending comfort to your broken heart. Xoxo
This is exactly how I feel. Words have captured the agony perfectly
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