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Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Wordless and (Not So) Wordless Wednesday

Oh my Lord, first Mr. LA, and now this ?!?!?
 This is what happened when Mommy's busy and let Miss Chatterbox played with Mommy's iPhone.

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Tuesday, August 30, 2011

10 Cheapskate Things I've Said (with UPDATE!!)

UPDATE: "All things are possible in the blogging world."  Need prove?  Check this out.  On September 2nd, 2011, our lovely Dweej received a brand spankin' new, oh-so-whitey-white.... laundry basket!!!  From a very sweet, caring blogger named Amber Doty, of  The Daily Doty.  True friendship at its best, I must say!

Here's a photo of Dweej totally rockin' that new laundry basket:


I still remembered the first time I came across her blog.  It was titled: House Unseen. Life Unscripted. 

Hmm, interesting, I thought at the time.

Then I read the little description underneath: "We bought a house in rural Michigan-sight unseen off the internet.  My husband quit his job in California and we moved our four kids across the country."

Well, that got my attention.

I started reading her posts and soon I was hooked.  How could I not?  Do you know anybody who's ever bought a $30,000 house off the internet, without having seen it before in her life?  Someone who packed up her entire family, drove for 5 days and 36 hours across the country, only to find that the house she bought was not only old and a 'fixer,' but that someone had stolen all the wiring and the plumbing, so that they had no water nor any electricity.  Oh and did I mention that at the time, her youngest was only four months old?

I read her posts regularly, and I found myself in awe of her ability to stay positive even when things seemed to be overwhelming and impossible to accomplish.  This woman is a fighter, a survivor, definitely a tough cookie.  I followed her through her journey turning that little wreckage of a house into a lovely and cozy home.  And by God's grace, she really did it!  You can see some before and after pictures here and here and here.

As if all those things weren't enough to send her to the mental facility, she also adopted several dogs, raised her own chickens, planted her own vegetable garden.  Oh, and she had just started homeschooling her children too.

Now I have never ever met someone who could handle that much stuff all at once.  That was until I 'met' a woman named Dwija (or better known as Dweej).  And you know what's even more amazing?  Was that she did it ALL with such positivity, passion, and a sense of adventure.  Oh, and have I mentioned that she also happened to be a funny, witty, and insightful blogger who wrote brilliant and original posts on a regular basis? 
This is one of my fave pics of Dweej.  She's so much fun and is positively brimming with enthusiasm!

Last but not least, one thing that made me a loyal fan and friend of Dweej, was the time when she took the time to write me a very personal email at the time when Mr. LA first brought up the divorce issue.  For the life of me, I will never ever forget the words she had written.  So very wise, sincere, and full of love.  And I SO love her for that.  I am forever indebted to her.  Love ya, Dweej!

Below is a guest-post that Dweej had written for me.  This is so classic Dweej--funny, witty, original, yet very, very wise.  Trust me, as long as you still have a heart, you WILL fall in love with Dweej.  Please, if you haven't already, go to her blog, House Unseen  Life Unscripted, and make sure you subscribe.  You'll thank me for it, and I do expect a thank you ;)

10 Cheapskate Things I've Said
by Dwija Borobia of House Unseen Life Unscripted

Being poor is a funny thing.

Well, maybe funny is the wrong word.  Maybe poor is the wrong word, too.

Let me start over.

Not having any money to spend at the moment makes you say ridiculous things.

I thought about that the other day as I was doing the laundry while saying one of those very ridiculous things.  And then I wrote it down.  Actually, you're in luck, because I wrote 10 of them down!

The Top 10 cheapskate inspired ridiculous things I've said, 
a list my former self would find a little insane:

10. "If I had a million dollars, I'd totally buy a new laundry basket."

That's right ladies and gents, our one and only laundry basket is over 11 years old! It has so many cracks and breaks in it that carrying laundry with it, particularly if that laundry is wet and I am hauling it out to the clothes line, is similar to carrying 26 pounds of pureed tomato in a garbage bag. I just can't keep it together, man. Someday I will have one of those new fangled firm-sided laundry baskets, you mark my words.

9. "No! Don't throw that newspaper in the burn barrel! I'll use it for cleaning."

Yes friends, you CAN clean class and several other essentially non-porous surfaces using newspaper instead of paper towels. My mirrors are glistening and we're not spending money on tiny rectangles of paper that we're just going to throw straight into the trash.

8. "I'll just eat these leftover cold, floppy french fries for lunch."

Don't get me wrong- we have food. I don't want people thinking my kids are gonna starve or anything. But it's the principle of the thing. I paid for those dang cold, floppy french fries and by golly I'm gonna eat 'em. 'Cause if I don't, what's next? Throwing entire gallons of milk away just because today is the sell-by date? Oh no you di'int!

7. " Throwing entire gallons of milk away just because today is the sell-by date? Oh no you di'int!"

See? I just totally said that.

6. "Unless a shirt exhibits the unwearable quality trifecta: stained, has holes in it, and shows your navel because it's so small, then it is still fine to wear:

Okay, I'll 10 year old daughter is the one who said this to me. And I was so proud I almost cried.

5. "Hey! Don't throw those oatmeal containers away! I can use them for....something."

For any of you family members who have ever suggested that I am at all like my grandmother (God rest her gentle soul. If only everyone in the world would strive to be like her, we'd truly be living heaven on earth. Sorry for the digression...), now I finally see it! The collection in that amazing woman's attic was priceless, I tell you. Priceless! And seriously, why throw away a perfectly good container that has a matching lid? Now that, that my friends would be crazy.

4. "Look, the chicken coop is not gonna cost us any money because you're going to build it out of the construction refuse in our barn."

Yes, I said this. And yes he did. And no it did NOT cost us any money. WINNING!

3. "It'll be fine. I'll just color it with a sharpie."

See, I have these shoes. They may or may not be getting totally worn out. There may or may not be huge scuffs at the toes which I colored with a permanent marker. But if I did color them with a permanent marker (spoiler alert: I did), chances are that it worked out great and you should totally try it sometime.

2. "It's gonna be so awesome when we don't have any more holes in our ceilings."

Yes, we totally do. And you bet it's gonna be awesome! Soon....I can feel it.

1. "If we shove some fluff in there and cover it in packing tape, do you think the ice will stop coming in?"

About a space in the wall at the corner of our northern exterior wall, which yes, we discovered coated in ice in January.  We did stuff the fluff and apply that snazzy tape, and guess what?  No more ice.

Hah!  Take that, money!

Monday, August 29, 2011

He's So Vain, He Would Think This Post is NOT About Him

Just a quick post today, which would mostly be about Mr. LA (aka Mr. Lame-Ass, aka my midlife-crazed husband).  

Yep, that's the guy who bought a new SUV with a kick-ass engine a few months ago without telling me.  The same dude who then told me he wanted to get a divorce a month later.  The one I chose to stay married to despite his lame-ass-ness, because I still loved him.

How's that for a quick recap, huh? 

Sooo... when most of the people in the East Coast were dealing with the aftermath of hurricane Irene, my husband was dealing with a crisis of his own, for which he went under the knife earlier today.  Unfortunately, for a reason I'm quite ashamed to say.  

Pure vanity.  

This morning he just got a procedure done to remove his eyebags.  Yes, you read correctly.  Eyebags, people.  We actually went to one of those Dr. 90210s and got his 'problem' fixed.  Not that this is a common thing among our friends or anything like that.  I think he's probably the only (or at least the first) man that I know who's had something like this done.

Sorry, I forgot, did I mention that he's having a midlife crisis?

Anyways, to make the long story short, now that he's just fresh from the operating table, Mr. LA will be going through a period of recovery that would last between one to two weeks.  Until then, his lower eye lids are stitched up, his upper face areas swollen like he'd been beaten to a pulp, making him look a lot like Frankenstein except this one's in boxer shorts.  I have to help him apply three different types of eyedrops on an hourly basis and remind him to take his plastic-bag-full of post-surgery medications.  I would also serve as his chauffeur and make sure he's comfortable enough.  At least for the next few days.  Yes, happy, happy days!

Tomorrow, a friend of mine, who is dear to my heart, will be guest-posting on my blog.  I am humbled, not to mention damn lucky, to have her write for me.  Her posts are ALWAYS original, witty, hilarious to boot, AND insightful.  The sky's the limit for this superwoman reincarnate.  

So please, please make sure you come back tomorrow to read her post here.  She is AMAZING.  Truly one in a million. 

Now, wish me luck (and a whole lotta patience) in the next few days, as I take care of Mr. Frankenstein LA in his endeavor to become one handsome, metrosexual (click here for the Urban Dictionary's definition) man.  


Friday, August 26, 2011

Death by Fart

This week’s assignment was simple: write a story of your choice. The catch? Write it as a tweet. Use only 140 characters – including spaces.

“Death resulted from accidental fire caused by fart.” 

I never handled such a case before, but someone had. Trembling, I dialed her number.

A writing prompt by:

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Are You Smarter Than a First Grader?

Every day, as part of her routine, Miss Chatterbox brings home two or three books of her choice from her class' bookshelf.  We would then read the books together after dinner--well, she reads, and I'm supposed to be helping her with whatever words she's having trouble with.

Last night, we were in the middle of reading, Hello Kitty: Best Friends, when suddenly my daughter commented on something that she was on one of the pages.

Okay, here is the scene that we were looking at, at the time.  What do you see?


It's cute, isn't it?  Sweet, harmless, a bit on the girly side (then again, it's Hello Kitty!), and its message "Shower the ones you love with kindness," is a good one.  Nothing out of the ordinary, really. 

My sentiments exactly.  But then, as I was about to turn over the page, Miss Chatterbox stopped me and said, "Wait, wait, Mommy.  I wanna show you something."

"Okay," I said.  Translation: What is it this time?  Can we possibly move any slower here?? I've got to get back to my blogging!

She then pointed her finger at Hello Kitty (it's the one on the left wearing a pink ribbon, by the way) and said, "Why are they eating cupcakes when they're about to go to sleep?"

Oh yeah, good one.  Didn't see that before.

On second thoughts... That's right, why would Hello Kitty and whoever-the bunny-name-is be eating in the first place, when they are clearly already dressed for bedtime, and at such a late hour (see the moon and the stars on the window?)?!?  And seriously, cupcakes???  Could it be any 'healthier'???  And three cupcakes, I repeat, THREE, when there are only two of them?  Where's the sharing in that??? 

Ok, obviously I have a tendency to dwell excessively on the details.  Which I would have missed if it weren't for Miss Chatterbox asking me the question about the cupcakes.  And why is it that I'm in awe with her ability to do so?  She's already a friggin' mini version of me!!!  Eeeek.... 

Anybody else saw that cupcake thingy?

Thoughtful Thursday and other thursday hops

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It's So Easy:  
  1. Follow the hosts: Look who Found the Marbles, Do Sweat the Small Stuff and Rock and Drool.  
  2. Link up your favorite post from the past week and check out some of the other great sites in the linky.
  3. That’s all there is to it!
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Wednesday, August 24, 2011

(Not So) Wordless Wednesday: Miss Chatterbox WON!

This past weekend Miss Chatterbox won her first trophy in a dance competition.  She was ecstatic!  Her face here said it all :)

I used this cool iPhone apps called Hope Poster Photo Filter.  What do you think?

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